Memories My Daughter Remembers That Left Me In Awe

Where do you fit in the story of your child's life? Yeah we know you birthed them, clothed them and work tirelessly for them to have those things they need and ultimately want. However, in their story, you would be surprised at where you come into play.

Yesterday, at MOPS the the head of women's ministries shared with us a story about her children. Her now 17 year old asked what did she and her brother do all day with their mom. It further prompted me to go home and ask my daughter who is 16, what are her earliest memories of me. To my surprise COLLEGE.

Jaylah joined me for the college ride and I’m grateful. It was not the conventional college student arrangement but I had the best college roommate ever, a 2 year old! Imagine that for a moment.

Jaylah's bedroom in my college apartment

Anyhow, Jaylah proceeded to share with me some experiences that I forgot about, like watching movies in the Frick Center at Elmhurst College. Countless hours we spent in the Library. Watching the play “A Raisin In The Sun,” a production performed by the students and finally, my college graduation. I was stunned!

These memories began to make me think about my other kiddos and how they see me. Will they even remember all of these cool outings and events, or will they just remember me saying STOP and NO! Will they recall us having silly moments, or will they only remember me shushing them while I finish writing an article. Things that make you go hmm.

Despite what they recall, it's important we operate off intention. Being intentional about what we do and how we do it as parents, is key. The memories Jaylah recall all took place between the ages of two and four. Unbeknownst to me, these memories are ingrained in her mind, while for me they are barely recalectable. I was in awe, primarily because I began to think about all of the moments where I may have compromised my integrity as a parent during those days. OUCH, harsh reality! Like late nights on campus knowing we had to be up at the crack of dawn to get the day started or arguments with her father because you know, the relationship was diminishing etc.

Today consider how you can be more intentional about how you move and shake. This doesn’t mean you are programming yourself to be the perfection deity, moreso, just taking an inventory on how much purpose you push into how you interact with you children and how you behave individually. The mind of a child is something else. Jaylah mentioned nothing about the cool things I bought her or the cool places we had gone. They were all moments in time where the events were impactful enough for her to remember. I’m amazed!

As I type right now, my