Parenting Guilt: Feeling Subpar

Some days it feels like your ability to be a parent is subpar. Your child(ren) want things you can't quite give them and they want to go places you can’t quite take them. As much as we don't want to admit it, it all weighs heavily on our heart strings. We begin to feel self conscious of our parenting regarding all things "giving" to our kids. It can be extremely difficult on parents when we feel as though we are not adequate enough for our own child(ren). Although “out loud” some people will say they don’t care, however, its not true. If you are a parent, you do want your children to go places they deserve to go and have things, its a natural instinct (well it should be). Here are a couple things you can do to make those moments not so tough.

  • Have an open conversation with your child(ren) to let them know there are some things you can not do because you do not have the adequate means to complete the task. Be honest with them. Let them know you don’t have it in the budget or there is not time, however when you think it is possible, you will share the information with them. I have always been very upfront with my children because I do not like broken promises myself. My mom has always laughed at how honest I am. There was one time my daughter was happy about eating fast food (it was in the budget that week), she shared the news with my mom! LOL! If you know my mom ask her about it, the verbiage my daughter used was hilarious!) The last thing you want to do is lie to your child(ren) or make broken promises that land you down the road to not being credible. You don’t want that.

  • Explain to them while what they want is not feasible at the moment, perhaps there are some other things they may want to consider. This is important because they need to understand that in life you do not have things your way all the time, you have to have alternative plans.

  • Take a moment to yourself to feel better and release the guilt that you are feeling. Its natural and it is okay. Meditate, pray, have a drink, whatever you need to do (no drugs) to pick yourself up by your bootstraps to get back on your parent game.

Parenting is not easy. We worry, we are frustrated and we are simply just trying to do the best we can do. If you are reading this, I know for certain that you are doing a great job! You are giving your child(ren) the very best that you can offer and as minimalist as it may seem to you, you are making things happen and for that, you are KILLIN’ IT! Keep looking ahead!

“Mama said they’ll be days like this, they’ll be days like this mama said...”

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