I always knew I wanted to be a mother and there was no question about it. At an early age I was envisioning me and my husband nestled in suburbia with our four kids and me being the proverbial suburban mom (must have been what I saw on television because I am from the Westside of Chicago). While I know you may be thinking “Well girl that ain’t far from reality.” You are right but it took time to transition into this place.
Pregnancy at 17 was a pretty big pill to swallow. To have your sins on display is a type of humiliation that really, only teen moms can truly understand. You have to answer to so many people so to speak, and you immediately become an adult once the news breaks. It's a tumultuous time mentally. Nevertheless, I felt responsible and having my baby was something I truly felt called to do, not necessarily the way I felt when I was young BUT I felt it was the right thing to do.
MOTHERHOOD began as soon as I peed on that stick and those two lines revealed themselves. It was November. Here I am a mom, even before my precious baby was born, I was mom!
MOTHERHOOD has meant sacrifice. During my 16 years of parenting, I have learned so much about myself. I have discovered my ability to love beyond the boundaries that society has prefereated for us. I have examined my life in ways that I don’t think I would have ever considered. I have managed to become manageable (Motherhood does that to you). I have the capacity to be malleable, an attribute I would have never used to
describe myself. I have developed into a woman that is compassionate. I consolidated my personal desires in a way that still allowed me to have attributes that don’t compromise who I am. Above all of this though, Motherhood for me has been full of wealth. It is an anointed position that we take on once and sometimes many times over, with the same feelings of excitement and anxiousness, that creates a set of mixed emotion that's hard to decipher.
Motherhood is unconditional love!
Motherhood is Prayer.
Motherhood is hardship.
Motherhood is silent cries.
Motherhood is excitement.
Motherhood is my soul speaking.