It's back to school time and for many of us, that means long days and nights of extra-curricular activity drop offs, pick ups and rushing to prepare dinner in time. Or, let's talk about packing lunches, school projects and PTA meetings. Often times, we create this whirlwind life of over extending ourselves during the school year. I've decided, I am kicking off the school year with the spirit of relinquishing the idea that I have to do it all and over-extension.
To create a healthy balance between YOUR life as a woman, YOUR life as a spouse/partner and YOUR life as a mother, it's important to implement boundaries with YOURSELF first because we actually are the ones who self inflict ourselves with stress.
Consider the power of NOT RIGHT NOW
It's a soft NO but it gives you the time you need to assess if the “something” is feasible for you at the moment. Soft no’s leave wiggle room for you to revisit an idea or situation. This is the perfect way to approach the school year because you will be thrown in many directions. Evaluate the situation before signing up to do something that you feel depletes you.
No IS a Viable Option
NO is your arch nemesis. You have the power to exert a hard NO when you are asked to do something that interferes with those things that are important to you. You don’t have to sign up for PTA, classroom mom, team mom or any other position or event. You unapologetically have the right to do the things that you feel bring less stress to your workload girl, don’t get caught up.
Your Last Name Isn’t Jones
Well, maybe it is! At any rate, you are not obligated to keep up with the Joneses. What one family fully immerses themselves into, you are not required to do. It's important to remember, you may not be privvy the sacrifices that people are making to make things happen. Do not allow the spirit of jealousy or anxiousness to creep in because you are not doing what other families are doing. Continue to do what works for your tribe sis.
Remember Who You Are
If you didn’t learn anything from the Lion King as a child, as an adult it's important that your remember who you are. As mothers and fathers we can allow parenting to overshadow the things we actually enjoy doing. This school year, remember to allow time for yourself. Set aside time to recharge and recalibrate yourself. Parenting is not easy, you need to take care of yourself in order to operate at the optimum speed necessary for your family. This does not mean mani, pedis and trips mamas. Let’s get more realistic. Eliminate screen time for an hour, read a book, take a hot bath or hot shower, WASH YOUR FACE, take a walk, etc. We are becoming too engulfed in the “Look at me and get jealous” culture. A mani and pedi can’t be done daily...well, it can but I don’t think there are many people doing that. Get back to loving on you.
This school year, approach it in a way that doesn’t bring stress to your heart. Change your mindset and be more intentional about how you spend your time and exert your energy.